A Mother’s Heart – Day 11 – Standing in the Gap

Today, let’s discuss mothers who stand in the gap in their homes. Just what does that mean? It’s a reference to mothers who are born again but their husbands are either not saved or they have chosen the way of the world for a time. The picture I used for today’s devotional is a poignant depiction of the mother’s role in a situation like this. She is constantly mending what has been spiritually broken in the home, sewing together the threads of faith and love that can sometimes fray when Dad is not involved. In her unwavering commitment, she not only embraces the nurturing aspects of motherhood but also takes on the essential responsibility of providing spiritual guidance, actively representing both roles of mother and the spiritual father. When Dad is not representing the Lord in the home, someone has to teach the children about love, compassion, and the values that ground them. Someone has to stand in the gap, which resorts to Mom; her prayers become the shield over her family, her teachings shine a light on the path for her children, nurturing them in the ways of righteousness while she remains a beacon of hope and strength. In doing so, she cultivates an environment where faith can flourish, encouraging her children to develop their own relationship with God, ensuring that the legacy of faith continues to thrive within their hearts. As good as this sounds, it is overwhelming for mothers to carry that burden alone.

Fathers are so important! Children need the firm foundation that Dad builds for the home, which he is to build on Christ. This foundation is crucial because it shapes the values and beliefs of the children as they grow. When Dad is an active participant, he fosters a sense of security and direction, instilling biblical principles that guide their lives. However, when Dad is not involved in this essential role, that foundation becomes the responsibility of the mother, a burden that she may not be prepared to carry fully. Leading the family spiritually is not in her wheelhouse; it is not a task that God has assigned to her. Her husband is meant to lead the home as he is led by Christ, taking responsibility for nurturing the family’s spiritual growth together. The mother plays a crucial role in enforcing and teaching the children according to the father’s leading, which supplements the instruction with her own insights. Yet, when the father is guiding the family in the ways of the world, prioritizing the world’s standards over biblical teachings, the children are caught in the crosshairs of conflicting morals and values. They find themselves fed two different sets of morals and, as they navigate their young lives, they quickly begin to see compromises and contradictions that can lead to confusion and disconnect in their understanding of right and wrong. This two-headed coin can create a tumultuous environment where the children struggle to establish their own identities in Christ, often leading them away from the strong spiritual foundation that is intended to guide them.

A mother struggles when she is left to the spiritual upbringing of her children. On top of everything else she has to do to keep her home going, this can be an overwhelming burden. It sometimes becomes more a burden than a joy to teach her children about the Lord. Her children hear one thing, but Dad does the opposite. How does a mother navigate around that with her children without dishonoring their father in their eyes? It’s a battle, that’s for sure. She has to stay fortified with the armor of God in order to fight the darts of the enemy. His attacks are never fair. Just as a lion doesn’t think of fairness when he is looking for prey, neither is Satan fair. He catches you at your weakest moments. (1 Peter 5:8) She clings to the hope that as the Lord allows these trials and challenges in her life, she will honor Him through it all.

Then there are those mothers and fathers who have done what the Lord has taught them to do in leading their children in the ways of the Lord. The children have been raised in church and taught biblical standards to take with them into adulthood. However, every child is different and not everyone will continue in that teaching. Some are pliable and easily taught, while others are hard-willed and resistant to guidance. The complexities of adolescence can amplify these differences, often leading to conflicts and misunderstandings. Some get to the point that they discard what they’ve been taught and go to the ways of the world instead; they may seek acceptance in peer groups that do not share their foundational beliefs. This departure from cherished teachings and values can be painful not only for the parents but also for the children, creating a gap that seems insurmountable. Their decision has led to defiance filled with bitterness, which often manifests as resentment toward their upbringing and parents. Now that they are out of the home, Mom can no longer mend the torn tapestry she so desperately tried to sew for her family, feeling helpless as she watches her children navigate through life without the principles she held dear. Because she was the parent that was with the children the most during their formative years, she is looked upon with contempt and has become the “bad guy” in her prodigal’s life, grappling with the painful label of “failure” while yearning for reconciliation and understanding. In her heart, she carries the weight of unfulfilled hopes for her children, wishing they could return to the warmth of their shared values and familial love. She feels as though she overlooked the needs of her prodigal child and “missed something.” The enemy uses this situation to attack her while she’s down. Praise the Lord, however, that she has the Word of God and His Holy Spirit to encourage and comfort her.

Dear mother, you are not alone. So many mothers are going through something similar. God will use it to give to you beauty for ashes, oil of joy for mourning, and a garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness! He loves you and doesn’t want you wallowing in deep sorrow. Be encouraged and move forward. Don’t let one child’s wayward path be the prominent chapter of your book. You may have other children who are being faithful, so let them be the prominent chapters of your book!


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