Psalm 34:18-19 The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. (19) Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all.
We long for the day when he reaches out to restore fellowship. Then he might reflect on our efforts with a sense of appreciation rather than resentment. We can’t pinpoint one specific thing that we did wrong as he made it a point to list a plethora of our faults. We know some parents whose children turned to drugs, got in trouble with police, some have rap sheets that are quite long. While other parents have no idea what they did wrong, but you could probably find the root of the problem lying with worldly friends.
Children have a built-in desire for friends, as we all do. Their need for companionship is often rooted in the innate human longing for connection and understanding. That is how God created us. That is why He created Eve because God said it was not good that the man should be alone. (Genesis 2:18) The importance of good, equally yoked friendships cannot be stressed enough; these relationships provide a foundation for social skills, emotional support, and personal growth in the Lord. Friends can make or break your child if parents aren’t present in their social life. I raised my children in church but that doesn’t guarantee their immunity from bad choices in friendships. Unfortunately, the ones that my sons gravitated towards were not good for them. To top it off, they were the pastor’s grandchildren. We couldn’t very well forbid our sons from hanging out with them when they were attending the church’s private school. I regret the choice we made by having our sons attend there, but that is a mess that cannot be cleaned up. I won’t be able to tell this side of Heaven the extent of the damage this did to them. But what I do know is that my prodigal son holds deep-seeded resentment for this very thing. Not only was he bullied and made fun of, but he also claims things that cannot be shared here without dishonoring the man of God.
Our son prodigal will not have an open dialogue with us whatsoever. He has removed himself from any kind of contact with us. If only he could understand that we sent our children to private Christian schools in order to protect them from the evils of this world. We did not do it to keep them from what is called socialization today. We did it to protect them spiritually. Alas, the end result was that very thing we feared would happen! He caved in when it came to peer pressure, succumbing to the allure of a lifestyle that seemed far more exhilarating than the one he knew. He saw life outside the church as tempting and intriguing, filled with vibrant colors and moments of freedom that beckoned to him. It didn’t take long before the enemy and his world had their way with him, leading him down a path of choices that often felt greater than our teachings. Our other son, the alpha male, took the bull by the horns and created havoc in our home; his defiance echoed through our walls, challenging our authority and testing our patience.
The Book of Proverbs is filled with verses dealing with the fool, providing a stark reminder of the consequences of folly and the choices that lead one astray. As parents, we tried so hard to keep them from the world, shielding them with our beliefs, but we ultimately failed to teach them how the world really was, its complexities, and its challenges, leaving them unprepared for what awaited outside our doors. As I look back on the lack of my parenting skills in this area, it is with much regret, knowing that we could have better equipped them for life’s journey. Although they both have turned out to be wonderful men, each forging their own paths, just not men in love with God, which weighs heavily on my heart as I reflect on the decisions we made during their formative years.
I’ve said this several times so far in this series that we were not perfect parents, and I realize now that our journey has been filled with both triumphs and challenges. However, we did the best we could with what we gleaned from the Scriptures, the messages delivered in church, and the guidance we received from counseling. Our intentions were genuinely pure, rooted in love and a desire to guide our children toward a fulfilling life. Nevertheless, our prodigal son does not see it that way, and it pains us to acknowledge that he feels neglected and angry. The gap between our intentions and his perception has been difficult to bridge, especially since he no longer wishes to see us or speak to us.
Isaiah 40:29 He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.
Dear mother, don’t be discouraged! The same God who watches over us, watches over our prodigals, never taking His gaze away from them even in their wandering. His eye is on the sparrow, let alone one of His creation, created in His image, for each of us holds a unique place in His heart. We are promised that all things will work together for good, reminding us that even in the midst of trials and uncertainty, there is a divine purpose at play, weaving together the tapestry of our lives in ways we might not yet understand. I use the word tapestry a lot because that’s exactly what I see my life as. If I look at the underside of a finished tapestry, I see knots and scrambled threads. However, the finished side is the way the Lord sees His work. We won’t know until we reach Heaven just how beautiful our life’s tapestry will be. So trust in the journey that the Lord lovingly placed you in, for His love is unwavering, and in times of hardship, we can find comfort in the knowledge that He is always at work behind the scenes, turning our pain into purpose and our struggles into strength.
Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
If you happened on this page and would like to read more content on the various scenarios of a mother’s heart, you can find the table of contents here.
